"Great personality"
I've been asked often;
'What's most important to you in a girlfriend?', to which I can quickly reply "Personality". Sometimes I've been asked;
'What's the first thing you notice about a girl?'
I usually say the eyes, or smile, something like that.
Thankfully I have never been asked;
'what is the first thing that attracts you to another person?'
I am glad for that. Who wants to be asked something like that? Not me!
It's not so much the question that bothers me. It's answering the question that I want to avoid.
If I am asked this question, and I choose to answer it, one of two things will happen.
Either I will lie, and deal with that on my conscience not to mention risk them finding out that I lied and be upset with me not because they didn't get the acurate answer but because I was dishonest with them. Or I will choose the less favorable option.
There is another posibility though. One that has worked well for me and every politician ever interviewed by television. Instead of answering the question I will give a statement on the same subject without directly or indirectly answering the specific question in anyway...
Q: "So Joses, what are you first attracted to in a woman?"
A: "Tom, I really think that personality is the most important thing to me in a relationship, a persons morals obviously are very important to how we relate to each other but without compatable personalities you won't have much of a future"
Q: "Really? Personality is the first thing you'd notice upon meeting someone in a restaurant?"
A: "I really think to have a future with someone you must have common ideals, I don't think it's so important that all your interest be the same so long as you can support each other in the various activities which the other participates."
Q: "How do you react to the physical appearance of a person at first sight?"
A: "A persons physical features are a mere portion of what makes a person unique. I think that it is a terrible thing to judge someone before allowing them to demonstrait their capabilities and skills.
This is the most ideal way to handle the question I think. Certianly better than the truth.
I'm not about to answer that question to anybody. If anybody was reading this I certainly wouldn't key it out.
The only people I want to answer that question around are the people who would never ask me the question in the first place..."the guys".
It's with them and only with them, during those special times, that I can act a fool and be a totally chauvanistic, shallow, explicit, stupid, insensitive, pathetic, obnoxious pig without trace of emotion, operating solely off my sex drive and not feel bad about it.
What a glorious thing to have, a group of people that will allow you to say everything opposite of decent and laugh along while you say it. Truth or not, they don't care.
These are the only people I want to tell the shallow truth to. They are the ones that are gonna support me in my view. It's their oppinion that is least important to me in the long run. They are not the people I am concerned about hurting, and so they are the people I am able to be the most honest with. If the good people in my life knew how shallow I was they certainly wouldn't want to know me.
I know good and well that if any of them had the same superficial attractions as I do they would never think to speak about it, much less ask me what I was first attracted to in another person.
Or would they?
'What's most important to you in a girlfriend?', to which I can quickly reply "Personality". Sometimes I've been asked;
'What's the first thing you notice about a girl?'
I usually say the eyes, or smile, something like that.
Thankfully I have never been asked;
'what is the first thing that attracts you to another person?'
I am glad for that. Who wants to be asked something like that? Not me!
It's not so much the question that bothers me. It's answering the question that I want to avoid.
If I am asked this question, and I choose to answer it, one of two things will happen.
Either I will lie, and deal with that on my conscience not to mention risk them finding out that I lied and be upset with me not because they didn't get the acurate answer but because I was dishonest with them. Or I will choose the less favorable option.
There is another posibility though. One that has worked well for me and every politician ever interviewed by television. Instead of answering the question I will give a statement on the same subject without directly or indirectly answering the specific question in anyway...
Q: "So Joses, what are you first attracted to in a woman?"
A: "Tom, I really think that personality is the most important thing to me in a relationship, a persons morals obviously are very important to how we relate to each other but without compatable personalities you won't have much of a future"
Q: "Really? Personality is the first thing you'd notice upon meeting someone in a restaurant?"
A: "I really think to have a future with someone you must have common ideals, I don't think it's so important that all your interest be the same so long as you can support each other in the various activities which the other participates."
Q: "How do you react to the physical appearance of a person at first sight?"
A: "A persons physical features are a mere portion of what makes a person unique. I think that it is a terrible thing to judge someone before allowing them to demonstrait their capabilities and skills.
This is the most ideal way to handle the question I think. Certianly better than the truth.
I'm not about to answer that question to anybody. If anybody was reading this I certainly wouldn't key it out.
The only people I want to answer that question around are the people who would never ask me the question in the first place..."the guys".
It's with them and only with them, during those special times, that I can act a fool and be a totally chauvanistic, shallow, explicit, stupid, insensitive, pathetic, obnoxious pig without trace of emotion, operating solely off my sex drive and not feel bad about it.
What a glorious thing to have, a group of people that will allow you to say everything opposite of decent and laugh along while you say it. Truth or not, they don't care.
These are the only people I want to tell the shallow truth to. They are the ones that are gonna support me in my view. It's their oppinion that is least important to me in the long run. They are not the people I am concerned about hurting, and so they are the people I am able to be the most honest with. If the good people in my life knew how shallow I was they certainly wouldn't want to know me.
I know good and well that if any of them had the same superficial attractions as I do they would never think to speak about it, much less ask me what I was first attracted to in another person.
Or would they?
posted by Joses @ 10:00 AM
2 Comments:
At 6:00 PM,
Anonymous said…
Joses, Joses, Joses....
you're crazy. And by crazy I mean insane and by insane I mean fun. I was reading trying to remember a time in our (what is it 7 and a half years now??) friendship when I have seen you be seriously chauvinistic or operate completely on your sex drive. And while we've had conversations that on some level operated on sex drive alone, I can't recall you ever being that way..which surprised me a bit. But here's my question...why are you so scared of answering that question?? Isn't the answer merely your preference, opinion? Would you be so guarded in answering whether you prefered purple to blue? Just a thought...nice to see you rambling again. Love you Joses!
ps...I'm not your roommate or your mother so your "fan-base" is a bit wider than you thought
At 12:04 AM,
Anonymous said…
I hope that you saw more in me than what you reflect in this blog, buddy. But, I know that you'll make it through. I wish I didn't have to read these knowing as much as I know. I wish I could be just as ignorant as the jerk that keeps sending hate messages! But, I know that I'm all the better for seeing the personality in you, at first glance. The immediate commanding attitude and yet calm and so mysterious! Either way, I know more than the average joe and I know that there's a lot more beneath the surface than what people are seeing in these blogs. I also know that you'll get through it all and that the dismal drone I feel surfacing in my heart from the ice cold pain in some of these blogs will go away just as it will go away for you, too. Replace it with the warmth of the sun and the beauty of spring, and with a new beginning in our lives. 10-4, over and out.
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